Nice to meet you, Dave! See ya later, TONY!

If you ever run into a guy who talks about nothing but competing in an ironman and building things, you're probably at a bar--or you're probably talking to my friend's landlord.  If you find a time where he's not talking about himself, you're not talking to this guy.  In your first conversation with him, you will learn specific details regarding the following: girlfriend issues, daddy issues, mommy issues, and that he does ironman and builds things.  That first conversation will take the fun out of all future conversations, so for conversation # 2 the only thing you can do to escape is:  make zero eye contact and hope he stops talking, try to talk constantly so he thinks you're rude and leaves, or [the only thing that has worked thus far] play rap music loudly on repeat.  He'll refer to it as "that music." You can use this one: